I am not going to give you any shocking facts about how smoking is harming your health. Shock treatment alone never helped me quit and I believe that if it worked for you, you wouldn’t be still smoking.
When I ask smokers why the health warnings do not persuade them to quit, the answer I usually get is this:
“Of course, I am afraid of dying. But I am more afraid of living a long life feeling stressed and deprived without my smokes”
And I get that.
See, what’s really stopping you from quitting, is fear. And in our case today, the fear of anxiety.
That’s why my aim is to shed some light into the dark moments of your anxiety.
When Do Stressed Smokers Light up
Let’s get a closer look at some anxiety-firing moments.
When I say anxiety, I am referring not only to the great misfortunes of life but also to the everyday stresses: the anxiety of a phone call, socializing, dealing with problems or the everyday responsibilities that keep piling up. Even the unexpected ringing bell can make us anxious.
Let us use the everyday responsibilities as an example. For most people responsibilities are slightly stressful, particularly for a working mother.
Most of the times you hear someone calling your name aren’t from your boss congratulating you or your children telling you how much they love you. There’s usually something going wrong or somebody making demands.
When that happens, if you aren’t already doing so, you will probably light up a cigarette.
You might not know why you do this. But you do know that for some reason it appears to help you.
I remember an aunt of mine who used to smoke one cigarette after the other (unfortunately, she is not with us anymore). I would bet 100 bucks that you can’t find a family photo where she was not either holding or putting out a cigarette.
When my cousins and I did something wrong or wanted to ask her for something, we would always wait until she lit a cigarette. Because she was calmer then.
Why couldn’t we talk to her when she wasn’t smoking a cigarette?
Now I know why.
It wasn’t her fault. That’s what smoking does to you. The more you smoke the more smoking takes away your peace of mind.
The irony? We get tricked into thinking that it’s doing the opposite.
Most smokers feel that smoking relaxes them. But nicotine does not have a relaxing effect on the body. If you take your pulse, then smoke two cigarettes and then take your pulse again, you will see that your pulse rate has increased.
So why do cigarettes appear to help with stress?
The Smoker’s Anxiety
No matter what people think, smokers are not delusional when they say: “Smoking helps me calm down”.
Let’s say you’ve had a stressful encounter with your boss or a family member. When you light up a cigarette you will relax – even if the nicotine makes your heart rate jump up and down like a cheerleader.
What we usually miss out on, though, is a very important information:
Your cravings.
Your cravings for a cigarette return every 45 to 60 minutes, if not sooner. And they increase your physical and mental anxiety – until your smoke and relieve them.
So here’s why smoking calms you down during an argument or any other stressful situation:
Without being conscious of it, you are already suffering from the anxiety caused by your nicotine cravings… on top of the anxiety caused by your problems.
So you have double stress.
By relieving the irritating craving at the same time as normal stress, you reduce your total stress and you feel less anxious than before.
That feeling of relaxation is real but also temporary. The cigarette cannot reduce our general anxiety. Because cigarettes do not remove our problems. The cigarette only causes more anxiety because we have to satisfy our cravings day in and day out.
That’s the “smoker’s anxiety.” The anxiety you experience because of your cravings.
Now another situation you might experience panic and anxiety is that of running out of cigarettes. Non-smokers do not have this anxiety.
The cigarette does not calm your nerves. Instead, it cripples them.
Want proof?
Start observing smokers, especially in occasions where they are not allowed to smoke. You will see that they’re usually:
• fidgeting with their hands
• tapping their feet
• or biting their lips.
Smokers have forgotten how it feels like to be completely relaxed.
As you can see, the one thing that’s constantly making you anxious is your cravings. You already have stress in your life. By being addicted to cigarettes, you are doubling your stress.
And I get it. Smoking helps you relax when you are driving in traffic, when you are having a phone call, after a stressful day at work, when you are trying to think a problem through or when you are having a difficult conversation.
But if you think about it, what other situations are there in our lives apart from sleep?
Smoking does not alleviate the stress of life. Smoking just relieves the stress of each craving.
As I said before, fear keeps you hooked to smoking.
Once you stop smoking, the nicotine will be out of your body within 2 weeks.But the fear of being constantly anxious without a cigarette may push you back to smoking at any moment.
The solution?
Discover ways to relax and feel good without a cigarette
….before you quit smoking.
Let me explain.
If you had never smoked in your life, you wouldn’t be relying on cigarettes to calm down. And you wouldn’t be more anxious as a person. You would have found different ways to relax when you are stressed – like non-smokers do.
But now, you are just used to relaxing by smoking. That doesn’t mean that you can’t relax in other ways.
You can.
See, finding ways to relax without your smokes BEFORE you actually smoke your last cigarette… does 2 things for you:
◦ it removes the fear of quitting
◦ it gives you practical ways to stay calm
As a result, quitting becomes a whole lot easier.
This might sound like common sense. And it is!
That’s why is the CBQ method shows you how to relax from your anxiety before you stop smoking.
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Tip: How to relax without your smokes?
You can start by writing a list of 5 things that you have in your life right now and that give real joy and peace.
You can start by writing a list of 5 things that you have in your life right now and that give real joy and peace.1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
In the beginning, you might have to squeeze your brain a little bit but if you start writing you will be surprised by your answers: It might be a walk in the park or seeing the smile on your children’s or grandchildren’s face. Whatever it is for you, be specific and just write it down.
What helped me relax without cigarettes was keeping a journal where I would – and still do – write my stressful thoughts. It helps me get perspective on my worries and keep my hands busy
Your turn now.
What could make you feel relaxed in your life right now except your smokes?
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If you want to learn more about the CBQ method and how you can use it to stop smoking without feeling stress, then this next bit is for you.
I’m running a FREE webinar on the 3 real reasons you’re struggling to quit (yes, stress is one of them) and how to overcome them asap with the CBQ method.
In this online seminar, I give you an exclusive day by day plan, so you can use the CBQ method all by yourself and quit
Click here to register. (Seats are limited so register now to make sure you reserve your place.)
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If you want to learn more about the CBQ method and how you can use it to stop smoking without feeling stress, then this next bit is for you.
I’m running a FREE webinar on How to Quit Smoking Easily and Permanently with the 4 Stages of the CBQ Method
In this online seminar, you will get a step by step plan to use the CBQ method all by yourself and quit for good.
Click here to register. (Seats are limited so register now to make sure you reserve your place.)
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